The Skirt That Turned Into a Belt

It’s easy to find tips about how to dress to (fill in the blank based on your goal).

But what about when you follow those tips and the dreaded still happens: a wardrobe malfunction?

It doesn’t need to be of Janet Jackson Nipplegate proportions to cause you great embarrassment.

I’ve created this series of tips to get you thinking beyond the ‘deer caught in headlights’ moment of horror and into the more productive ‘whaddya gonna do about it’ phase.

The most important thing to remember is, if you label it a wardrobe malfunction, chances are that you are the one who will be the most embarrassed, not those around you. The bystanders are more likely to be amused than offended, and it can actually be a great way to put others at ease. In any case, it’s a great conversation starter.


TODAY’S WARDROBE MALFUNCTION: The Skirt That Turned Into a Belt 

You’ve arrived at your destination, let’s say a restaurant. As you take off your coat, you feel a breeze and realize…..that as you were walking, your fitted skirt worked its way up to form more or less a belt, leaving you exposed.

Here’s what you can do:

1. Don’t take your coat off, but do leave it open.

2. Throw your purse on the ground, away from yourself and preferably near the person whom you are most concerned about seeing you half-naked.

3. Crouch down as if you’re planning to pick up the purse yourself, but instead, quickly grab the hem of your skirt and tug it over your derrière and as much of your legs as possible. No one will notice because they’ll be busy picking up (the contents of) your purse.

4. Excuse yourself to the restroom, if possible, with your coat still on.

5. In the restroom, wash your hands, but instead of drying them, run your wet hands lightly over your stockings. This serves as an emergency neutralizer for the static cling. If your skirt/dress has a lining, repeat the process on top of the lining, to neutralize the static cling between the lining and the dress.


Voilà! You can return to the rest of your group and laugh about it.